new year new me.. bullshit!

so, here it is.

new comers to show biz.

i started first day with a pop quiz.

which i finish it with ease...

today is 2014.

i'm becoming a teen.

because i'm eighteen.

i bought a bag of jelly bean

and gave it to an old friend named Eugene.

he gave me some caffeine,

and said that he got it out of a vending machine..

we finished it in the canteen.

the first day was ok.

when my boyfriend got me a cheese souffle...

but he told me he was going away

i asked: "USA?"

but he said: "Paraguay."

and added without delay.

he said don't be afraid

for he will be my fiance

he swept me of my feet

and promise he will not cheat

he advise me to complete

my college degree.

while waiting for him.

i love happy ending

and i hope his not pretending

and everything is really working...

and they are preparing for my big wedding.

problem?

what's your problem now?
do you have a f*cking problem?
i can honestly tell you that I hate you.
if you have a fucking problem with me, tell it to me.
or are you a coward?
you think that I like looking at you?
you know,
if it weren't for her,
i wouldn't even wanna be here at the first place.
i know you don't like me either,
so it's the best for us

well...
i've calm down and realize that what i wrote above is too strong and inappropriate.
so...
i'm gonna rephrase...
i'm not saying that i hate you...
it's like,
if you were on fire,
and i have a glass of water.
i'd rather drink it.
so..
yeah..
you'll get my point..

like a pro

i'm sitting at Starbucks drinking a cup of coffee and writing this post. 
i feel like a really pro blogger.
most of the movies show that people writing blog in a coffee house are pro.....
so i'm like in one of the movies now.
i've been sitting here for more than 3 hours.
looking at people come and go....
it's not like i don't have anything better to do,
but it's kinda interesting.

i've been looking at this women.
she came in like 30 minutes ago.
she has this really upset look
and her face is getting more impatient by the minute.
she was holding on to her phone and checking it every minute.
she looks like she's waiting for someone.....
she didn't buy any drinks or food
just sitting there like a fool...
i'm starting to rhyme again....
anyway she's still there.

 there's another couple from Korea, i think...
sitting beside me....
they keep looking over to my place...
they might think that this is a real blogger...
hahaha...
i'm losing my mind...
they don't talk a lot.
but they do they speak kinda loud...
i'm wearing my earpieace listening to a very noisy song
and i still can hear them talking...
he's eating a cake and licking hi fork every bite....
this is so gross......

there's another girl siting in front of me....
she's alone....
everyone is....
but you can see that some are quite lonely....
there's this guy,
he's sitting just beside the girl...
he has this sad sad look on his face...
i don't know what he saw...
but his face looks like he's about to cry....

i also see lots of people coming in a group
but ended up playing their own device....
some listening to songs...
some surfing internet...
most of them on facebook....
it's kinda sad.....
i see people's post on fb with who, at where, feeling happy...
but these people are actually sitting by your side scrolling the phones.
and you just tag those people in fb....
you are sitting face to face.....
but you are not talking...
what's the point of posting it on fb if you are not talking to each other??
or you just wanna show people that i'm not anti social...
i have friends..... and we hang out together.....
but in actual fact you just sit there together....
well if that's the case...
i'd rather come out by myself
sit in the cafe myself rather than with a bunch of friends on their phone...

we gotta spend more time talking....
like face to face not through chat and stuff...

we gotta appreciate our friends....
please....
phones and gadgets are gonna take over our lives soon.....

maybe i don't know

i don't know where am i,

but i surely don't miss your lies

sometimes i still miss your big brown eyes

cause when they look me in my eye,

my tongue gets tied,

brain goes white

and my stomach gets butterflies.

you could make my world reach the sky

but all you did was make me cry.

well Mr. Smart Guy,

i hope you are nearby 

cause i'm about to say good bye.

i can honestly say,

you blew me away

when you said you were gay.

you said you'd be amaze

that i'd still stay by your side.

i will never leave you

even if you're screwed.

but after you got a tattoo

of a guy name Hugh

i threw my shoe at you.

i guess this is it.

this is our split

i didn't throw a fit,

i didn't move a bit

i'm just gonna eat a banana split

and play in the kid's ball pit

till i get sick

and admit

you were just another misfit.

:) :( :) :( :)

do you know that my mood actually depends on you?

i get so frustrated when you treat me coldly,

i get so sad when you just reply a 'k'.

i get so angry when you start flirting around.

but you know,

just by using a smiley face,

you can instantly put back the smile on my face.

just by talking to me,

you make my brains go crazy.

just by calling me,

even just for a short talk,

you'll put butterflies in my stomach.

just by looking at me or smiling at me,

you make my heart stop.

I love you,

but I love me more.

that is why i choose to not reply you.

i am afraid that one day,

you might not reply me,

you might not say goodbye to me,

you might not send me home,

you might not save a seat for me,

you might not put smiley faces again~

i'd rather let you think i'm the bad one.

i'd rather just let our conversations end with a smiley face.

and i'd rather let our last meeting end by you waving bye from your car.

I CANT BELIEVE IT..........

i can't believe it,

it is the last day to do my preparation for spm......

tomorrow's the first paper.

and i'm still playing tetris........

i was playing candy crush, but my 5 lives are gone....

so i went to play tetris and my energy level is also low........

so now while waiting for everything to come back

i'm writing this......

i feel bad for not studying....

but i also feel bad for studyng......

the studying actually comes from

study + dying = studying

this is kinda like maths...

so for maths revision i'm done.

talking about maths.

maths actually is the acronym for

Mental

Abuse

To

Human

so i'm done for english revision....

i'm done...

my lives and energy levels are back to normal....

so i'm going off again~~><

!!!!!!!!

I'm sorry again..

But if you hate me, then....
Well I don't give a fuck...

But there's one thing I'm really sorry about.......
I've lost the one who loves me,
And the one I love....
Well, I've cherish everything and 
I'm not gonna regret bout it....

Now I might be sorry for what I did.
After that I'm gonna be sorry for what I didn't do.....