Crazy People, Nice Weather

It's about midnight,

but it is raining outside.

Here i am, sitting by the window,

listening to the rain.

drip,drip,drip...

it is quite calm to hear the steady dripping of the rain drops.

calms my nerves down.

It sounds like fairytale or those movie.

but i can't beleive,

i am like looking myself from the outside of my body..

i'm sitting calmly by the window.

i may looks calm on the outside,

but my heart is thumping crazily, it's gonna jump out of my body any sec.

this is another story.

well if you wanna know,

maybe in 2 more days.

in the next post.

i was thinking about everything i did in school,

before this holiday..

i thought about tricking people,

and it came out perfect.

i dun know that my friends know i'm tricking other frens.

but i know i'm cruel or evil or mean..

but it's just fun..

And I know that it is me who got u into trouble all along.

I have no idea at all.

how could someone be jealous?

i have nothing to admire of.

no one has been envy of me.

i don't know that my friends are right or not.

but they say that someone is actually jealous.

but i have no idea what is she jealous of?

i know it sounds silly,

but i really have NO IDEA AT ALL...

i'm not that smart i know for sure.

and my results aren't the best.

and my brain just works for thinking the mean stuff.

well anyway,

since i'm the one who got you in trouble.

then maybe it is me to take the responsibility,

i think

that the main cause is that i was getting too friendly to you.

and maybe even talking to you more often.

i can sense that u don't want to chat with me.

trough sms, or msn.

so maybe you're correct.

and i will not talk to you.

even though i need some infomation about something...

i won't even talk to you with my own mouth.

i'll ask someone to help me ask.

even if i can't trust that person.

it is always better than talking to you face-to-face.

the rain is going to stop soon.

and i am going to make a PROMISE to MYSELF.

that after this rain,

i'm not going to talk to you.

i have to control myself.

I, JOY LIM HAVE SWEAR THAT I'LL NEVER TALK TO YOU.

AFTER TODAY, IT IS OVER.

NO RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN U AND ME.